What's missing from Eurovision? Wackiness

There was something important missing from yesterday's EUROVISION SONG CONTEST, and no, it wasn't a better song for U.K. entrant ENGLEBERT HUMPERDINCK -- I don't think anything would have lifted the 76-year-old crooner into the top level.

No, there was a decided lack of wackiness (aside from Finland's monstrous LORDI reading his country's voting results).

Swedish winner LOREEN deservedly won for the song "Euphoria," but it is the type of electro-pop heard every day on radio stations across the globe.

What I always liked about the Eurovision contest was the occasional oddities thrown up by nations unused to the spotlight's glare.

Of course, this year's contest had Russia's singing grannies -- BURANOVSKIYE BABUSHKI -- but they were cute rather than wacky.

Where were the men on unicycles playing violins?

Where were the towering, conical hats?

Where were the homemade, matching costumes probably tailored by a contestant's mom?

Ireland's JEDWARD still seem comically homemade, but their low vote total betrayed what Europe thinks of them -- charmless chancers.
They're nowhere near as bizarre as DUSTIN THE TURKEY (Ireland, 2008).

The Eurovision is losing some of its attraction for me.

They need to bring back some of the weirdness.