The Mysteries of Daily Life

Today's rare Monday off work has given me plenty of opportunity to ponder the deepest mysteries of daily life.
I have been listening to "Ukrainski Vistupi V Johna Peela," the 1989 mini-album by Leeds indie rock stalwarts The Wedding Present. The band celebrated guitarist Peter Solowka's heritage by compiling a catchy set of traditional Ukrainian folk songs. It doesn't get much more "alternative" than that career move.
That unlikeliest of indie rock detours prompted me to consider other MYSTERIES OF DAILY LIFE:
1) Why do the cats favor playing with discarded gum wrappers over the expensive toys we purchased for them?
2) What do we have to do to make the girls simply pick up the towels on the floor of their rooms without constant reminding?
3) How on Earth does the Mr. Clean MAGIC ERASER really work?
This last mystery really has me stumped. I just cleaned all the grime off the bottom of the bathtub with about three swipes of a MAGIC ERASER. How?!?! It appears to be nothing more than a white block of foam! Yet a simple pass over the grime rendered it completely invisible. Hold on...
...Yep... I just checked: The grime is still gone!
Forget Jesus marrying and having a kid -- Somebody make a film about the MAGIC ERASER. This thing is incredible!!!
NEXT WEEK: Route 1 ponders yet another astounding mystery of daily life:
Why does Drambuie taste so damned good?